This might come as news to you, or it might be something you’ve already discovered. For me, I always thought a “single mom” was pretty much all similar. It’s really not though. After reading a blog post from Step Momming, I can to the realization that there are multiple types of single moms. To me most single moms could fit into four categories. The lifestyles of each of these categories are vastly different. While I claim to be a single mom lifesyle blogger, I really only fit one catigory of single mom.
Widowed Single Mom:
This would be hard, I can imagine that much. I honestly don’t know many widowed single moms, I haven’t read very many widowed single mom blogs. I haven’t even fanthomed what I’d do if this were my situation. For me this one is so far from my spectrum that it’s not some I can really accurately comment on. I just fell that it fits into a carigory of its own. I can’t imagine parenting through that level of grief though.
Divorced Single Mom:
For this category, we are talking about only divorced mom’s who Co-Parent, or have the baby daddy somewhere in theirs/the child’s life. Basically the dad hasn’t had his rights terminated. This is a type of single mom I could imagine being. When ever I read a Step Momming blog post, I see myself as that other mom. That birth mom they often talk about and it makes my stomach churn. It makes me thankful for the kind of single mom I am. I can tell you up front, I have NO IDEA how some of you single moms are able to co-parent. For me I just couldn’t don’t. With the divorce rate being so high, the thought of being a divorced single mom and having to co-parent with a step mom in the picture makes me never want to get married. That would be my luck you know? It would all crumble. I would be crushed, and there is no way to stop it if your “husband” wants out. Sure you can drag your feet a bit, turn a blind eye to really bad situations, but wouldn’t be it be easier just to not marry in the first place. Don’t get me wrong, the institution of marriage is a beautiful thing, and if you are single with no kids I totally encourage it. But I feel like in my case, where I already have a child, it would be too rocky of a road. I mean I ruin relationships pretty fast.
Never Married Single Mom’s:
This is the next style of single mom, it is very similar to the divorced single mom, but instead of being married to the baby daddy they never were. This single mom still has to co-parent, still has to deal with the ex all the time. Even though this one doesn’t seem quite as bad to me, (I mean it doesn’t make my stomach churn QUITE as much) it still sounds bad. I’ve come to realize, I just could never to the co-parenting thing.
Single Mom’s Who Don’t Co-Parent:
This is a categroy that fits both devorced and never married moms alike. It’s the category for those who don’t co-parenting. Basically it’s for all those “teen/young adult knock ups” whos ex’s are long gone, or for those women who had the dad’s rights terminated.
I can say these things in the most indearing, non judgemental way because this is the category I fit in. I can’t tell you how thankful I am to be in this category. I consider it to be the best. I’m so thankful that I don’t have to co-parent, that I don’t have to have those horrible lonely weekends, conflicts with the “other house”. One of the biggest things I’m thankful for is not having to worry about my child going to “the other house” and getting hurt/abused/neglected etc. If you want to learn more about this catigory of single mom, hop on over to my single mom lifesyle page. Since it’s the kind of single mom I am, it’s the kind of single mom I blog about.
Great post! Pretty accurate categories. I also fit into the 4th category and could never co-parent. I legit don’t know how other single moms do it! It just doesn’t seem natural or right to me. Anyway, super awesome to connect with a fellow single mom blogger! Feel free to check out my blog if you’d like! 🙂
Thanks! I’ll definitely check out your blog! 🙂
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